There is no doubt about it – Grief is a debilitating emotion and it is a journey that we all have to take. There are so many aspects to grief and grieving that one can’t really begin to label them, and it would be wrong to do so. The touch of the spirit world can never be forgotten once experienced, but there comes a time when an individual will feel that once again they have been abandoned. Why? Because one experience received is not recurrent and so the elation is short lived and one begins to feel abandoned once more.

Experiences After Death

When we lose a loved one, very often you will experience some form of connection from the other side. There are abundant stories of how loved ones have reached out with unusual signs and signals they are around. For instance, one person may experience the unusual appearance of a butterfly or perhaps some other sign from the animal kingdom. Another individual may feel the touch of their loved ones from the other side in some unusual way. There have been examples of communication from a spirit using some form of electronic controlling of a device. On one occasion, during a sitting, a mother was told her daughter would connect with her through the phone and she did. No matter how those experiences manifest, they are felt deeply at every conceivable level. All that can change and when no other experience is forthcoming, one can feel abandoned. We have such a yearning to hold onto those experiences, it’s rather like someone feeling the need to binge eat or drink, that feeling of euphoria wants and needs to be constant.

Have I been abandoned?

The answer is a resounding NO!, but of course that is often unbelievable to the individual who Is suffering and who is going through that loss. Unless you continue to feel that comfort you experienced in the first realization of death, you will come to the conclusion that you have been abandoned.

So what has happened, why do you feel such distance? There can be a few reasons for this, but the underlying truth is that you are not abandoned and that spirit are always trying to let you know of your presence. Let’s look at some possible explanations as to why you may feel the way you do and what could also be happening on spirit side of life.

You have been given proof and recognized it

Oftentimes, when someone passes over to the other side and they have some prior spiritual awareness, they will be acutely aware of the loss that you are feeling and they will be compelled to reach out in some way and let you know they are alive and well and are still a part of your life. This can come in many ways and could be signs of spirit from animal interaction, musical awareness, signs such as synchronistic events, smells and so much more – see the diagram above.

When you recognise that it was your loved one, it brings relief to the spirit who has gone home to longer feel that pull of your need to feel them –  they feel that they have proven their existence and so can now move to their next stage of learning. This does not mean they have left you, it just means they have moved onto the next phase of life and are no longer shackled to the earthly existence, they learn to feel you and commune with you on a different level, on a higher and clearer vibration.

Spirit moving on and developing does not mean you are abandoned

When your spirit loved ones move on, they do not leave you, they have a higher spiritual awareness and therefore are pulled to continue their development and are called to service. There is a compelling need to serve in some capacity. In a trance communication noted in “30 Years Among the Dead,” written in 1924 by Carl A. Wickland, M.D, Spirit clearly made it known they were serving in some way:

“I wish you could see how Uncle F. works in the dark earth sphere to help and to serve the unfortunate ones there, to prevent them from obsessing any one. He is so anxious to have everybody know the real truth on the other side, and it is a pity that so much dogma and creed are the stumbling blocks. The little time I have been gone I have learned so much.”

Many are called to service or are compelled to serve and to learn. Therefore, their vibrations change. As love is held upon that vibration, they are always connected to you through bonds of love. Those bonds will never be broken and the thought that is omitted is also that call on that love vibration.

Your grief is deep and you fail to recognize the signs of spirit

You are grieving, but you are so deep in your grief that you fail to realize or recognize the signs that your loved ones are all around you. Imagine if you will an impenetrable fog that you can’t see through. This is the epitome of your grief and your grieving. You can’t see the beauty of the spirit world because of that fog of grief. Your loved ones may be visiting you in your dream state, but can’t penetrate because of the heavy burdens of your grief. They will be sending you signs in your everyday life, because of your state of emotion, your vibration is emitting a foggy shield that is like your ego protecting you in the materialistic world but failing to open your spiritual eyes.

In your grief, you fail to see the blessings that your loved ones have because in your own selfishness you are consumed with your loss of how it’s affecting you. This is not negative, it is just a part of the learning and grieving process. You should not feel bad about it because the time will come when that will change and you will no longer be in that selfishness, you will become more selfless.

Opening Your Spiritual Eyes

grief and grieving - spirit is simple

“Spirit Is Simple – Man Makes It Complicated”

As a consequence when that fog lifts, you begin to see the new land, like Columbus finally seeing the new world and you begin to look at things differently. You begin to notice that spirit is around you and never far from you. How is this achieved? Very simple. By making a concerted effort to notice that which is beyond the material, to communicate with spirit on your own level, to speak from the heart, becoming more mindful of your presence now and by learning to meditate simply by connecting with yourself. The more you speak with your loved ones from your heart and not from a place of need, the easier that fog will lift and the sun will shine once more.

Jock Brocas
Jock Brocas is a professional medium, Researcher, and Author. He is also the president of the ASSMPI and editor in chief of The Otherside Press. Jock works closely with his colleagues to share knowledge with three lessons in mind, Love, forgiveness, and compassion.
Jock Brocas

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